"You have to train them"

No, I'm not talking about dogs.  I'm talking about men.  I can't tell you how many times I've had this statement "You have to train them" repeated to me.  My mom's said it, my friends have said it, even my younger cousin has said it - while her boyfriend sat right next to her.  This advice hasn't exactly been solicited, but wiser women feel the need to say it to me every time I mention that my fiance is moving in. 

My fiance and I have been living together for about two weeks now, and it's been bliss so far.  We've already had our first domestic fight, and it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.  One night while I was lying in bed, I saw Devin carrying one of our bed's throw pillows, which is adorned with a $40 Pottery Barn pillow case that I had to wait three months to get as it was on back order.  I calmly said, "What are you doing with that pillow?"  And Devin looked at me innocently, "I'm going to sleep on it.  I need two pillows."  I then, of course, lost my temper and said, "Oh no you're not. That's for decoration!"  "It's a pillow."  "It might as well be a picture on the wall because you're not sleeping on it!"  It was at that point that Devin realized that I was a little out of my mind at the time, so he just got into bed as far away from me as he could and faced his back to me.  

What I'm basically trying to figure out is how to talk to him about stuff like this that is common sense to women but unreasonable to men.  Another day, he unloaded the dishwasher without me asking.  Awesome.  Except later, I found a bunch of Tupperwares in with the drinking glasses.  How do I fix these kinds of things without discouraging him from emptying the dishwasher again?  I guess this is where the "training" comes in.  Maybe I should get some treats...